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Am I The Only One?

Thursday, September 23, 2004

Reckless Endangerment is My Middle Name

I almost hit three women with my car on the way to work today. Not just one, but three beautiful, wealthy, surgically-perfected young sirens who were out for a run on a busy street near my work. They can thank their own screaming for their new lease on life.

Honestly, I'm not a rebel. I stop at red lights, I watch for small children, and I generally don't mow down beautiful women with my car. Heck, I swerve to avoid the bowsers, too. But today I was in a hurry, and when I started to take a right on a red while still checking traffic from the left, I heard several loud screams and curses. I stabbed my foot down on the brake, and there in front of my car were three doe-eyed young women in tiny shorts and inadequate brassieres.

Now in my defense, the intersection has poor sightlines for oncoming traffic, and the young women did run in front of my car during a Don't Walk signal. But the pedestrian always has the right-of-way, and I'm sure I'd have been leaving the scene in handcuffs had I not been blessed with video-game-enhanced reaction times.

And yes, as they ran off after cheating death, I did check out their posteriors. One must appreciate beauty in the midst of chaos.


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